Safe Sex and Dating With Video Chat

Finding a date for Saturday night has become a lot easier with the onslaught of online dating. Rather than perusing the malls and grocery stores looking for eligible and attractive singles, those looking for a date can now peruse an endless list of specialty and regional dating sites, examining profiles and messaging potential interests within almost any criteria. As for those without a date for Saturday night, it is never too late to find that someone special. With adult dating and hook up sites also a growing trend, those left at home can still engage in some illicit activities of the adult nature. Many of the better adult dating and hook up sites now offer such features as group chat rooms, private chat rooms, instant messaging, VOIP phone, and now even private video chat. Can you even imagine the kinds of trouble you can now get into even from the confines of your own home?

While many online date seekers are still reluctant to embrace video chat, it seems the pros now far outweigh the cons. You see, with free dating sites, financed by Google advertising, becoming more and more popular, so to is date scamming. Date scamming refers to scammers who use fake profiles on (mostly) free dating sites to make contact with other members. Using fake pictures and information, these scammers usually try to encourage members to e-mail them directly. This way, these scammers can enter a free dating website, message dozens and dozens of members, and move on to the next free site. They never actually have to return to the site of origin, but instead wait to receive e-mails at one of their own fake e-mail accounts. These scammers than try to build a relationship with you, only to solicit money or banking information soon down the road. With video chat, members can now confirm at least the visual identity of the person they are communicating with. Though this might seem a bit frightening to some, it’s a lot more frightening to imagine what that gorgeous guy are girl you’ve been chatting with really looks like.

If the person you are interested in refuses to join you in a private video chat for even a minute or two, you should be very concerned. Though many may indeed be shy, or concerned over the possibility of you recording the chat, they need to be made aware that these are small prices to pay. Insist that you just want to confirm their identity, and that afterwards you will be satisfied with regular chat or instant messaging. Remember, however, that confirming what somebody looks like is only the first step. When you do choose to move your relationship offline, always meet somewhere public, preferably with a friend close by, and never leave to go somewhere private without first informing someone you know of where you’re going. Meeting people online for dating, or even just for casual sex, can be extremely fun and rewarding, so long as you take all the necessary precautions. Condoms, of course, are always an absolute must.

As for those who want to use video chat for more than just confirming identity, the possibilities are indeed endless. Remember, however, that video capture software is becoming more and more accessible and sophisticated. Even if the video chat software you are using does indeed make it difficult for others to record you, there is always software out there that will find a way. Be aware that anything you show or do on video chat can indeed be recorded. If you are planning on getting naked, you should at least consider certain precautions. One strategy is to video your face, then cover the camera, and then move the camera to capture your body. This way your body and face are not in the same shot, and there was a separated transition from one to the other.

Though there are always safety issues in hooking up with people online, it is still often safer than hooking up with someone at a bar or late night party. With meeting online, you always have time to carefully plan your first face-to-face encounter. No matter who you have your eye on, however, remember that people are not always as they seem, and being attractive does not exclude them as a potential carrier of a sexually transmitted disease. Though life is too short to live in fear, always govern your life with a healthy dose of common sense. Simply put, video chat makes common sense. It’s also a whole lot of fun. See you online.

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What You Should Know About Chat Rooms

CHAT ROOMS are “areas” on the Internet where users can have live, two-way conversations via text messages. Chat rooms can accommodate large numbers of people, who can read and respond to each other’s messages.

Some chat rooms are particularly appealing to youthful Internet users. Millions of young people from a variety of cultures exchange opinions daily on almost any subject. Some schools now tap this global resource. For example, with their teacher’s supervision, students in the United States might discuss social issues with fellow students in Spain, England, or elsewhere. Students may even chat about their class project with a qualified engineer, chemist, or another expert.

Many people who visit chat rooms, though, are not there to discuss academic subjects. If you have access to the Internet, what dangers should you be aware of?

A Hunting Ground for Sexual Predators

“I was talking with some people in a chat room,” says Abigail, “when a man asked me if I knew any 14-year-olds. He wanted to have sex with them. He said that he was willing to give them money for sex.”

Abigail’s experience is not an isolated one. The problem of online predators is so widespread that some governments have produced guides on how youths can be protected. For example, a publication of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) in the United States warns of individuals who immediately engage in sexually explicit talk. It also warns of those who “gradually seduce their targets through the use of attention, affection, kindness, and even gifts.”

Describing the specific methods used by some of these predators, the FBI guide says: “They listen to and empathize with the problems of children. They will be aware of the latest music, hobbies, and interests of children. These individuals attempt to lower children’s inhibitions gradually by slowly introducing sexual context and content into their conversations.”

It is not just perverted adults who pose a danger. You also need to beware of youths who are ignorant of or who deride the Bible’s moral standards. Consider the experience of a young man named Cody. He was chatting with other youths online when a girl invited him into a private chat area. She then asked him a sexually suggestive question. Cody had the self-control to terminate the conversation immediately.

Because of a natural interest in sex, you may find it extremely difficult to react the way Cody did. Peter, mentioned earlier, admits: “I thought I had enough self-control to terminate a chat session if the subject turned to sex. But time and again, I found myself hanging on and chatting about sexual subjects. I felt bad later.” You may wonder, though, ‘If I hide who I am in a chat room, is there really any harm in talking about sex online?’
Are Online Sex Discussions Harmful?

The Bible talks openly about sex. (Proverbs 5:18, 19) Admittedly, humans have an increased interest in sex during youth. So you should talk about sex. You need answers to your questions on this important subject.# However, the way you satisfy your curiosity about sexual matters will have a profound impact on your happiness, both present and future.

If you choose to chat online about sex, even if it is with people who say they are your friends, your experience could well end up being like that of a young man described in the Bible. Out of curiosity, he wandered near the house of a prostitute. At first, she just talked to him. Once his desire was aroused, though, talk was not enough. “All of a sudden he is going after her, like a bull that comes even to the slaughter, . . . just as a bird hastens into the trap.”-Proverbs 7:22, 23.

Similarly, talking about sex online could easily lead to your going after greater gratification. “I was chatting online with someone,” recalls a teen named Philip, “when an immoral picture popped up on my screen. The person I was chatting with had sent it to my computer.” Once your desire to consider sexually explicit material has been aroused, you may be tempted to pursue your interest further, such as in an adult chat room.% Many who fall into the trap of viewing pornography go on to commit immorality and suffer the inevitable consequences.-Galatians 6:7, 8.

People who want to talk about sex with you online do not have your best interests at heart. These strangers want to lure you into immoral talk-and possibly actions-to gratify their own desires.^ In an attempt to protect his son from a sexually exploitive person, King Solomon wrote: “Keep your way far off from alongside her, and do not get near to the entrance of her house, that you may not give to others your dignity, . . . that strangers may not satisfy themselves with your power.” (Proverbs 5:8-10) The principle behind this advice might be applied this way: Do not get near chat rooms where sexual topics are discussed so that you do not give your dignity to strangers who just want to satisfy themselves at your expense.
“Those Who Hide What They Are”

You may say, though, that you do not want to talk about sex online. Like Peter and Abigail, mentioned previously, you might see a chat room as a place where you can express yourself anonymously, without fear of embarrassment.** Even so, there is another danger that you should be aware of.

The anonymous nature of chat rooms could tempt you into becoming deceitful. Abigail says: “I would start conversations with people and then take on a personality to fit the conversation.” Like Abigail, you may be tempted to assume a different personality to fit in with a certain chat room group. You might conform to their standards of language or adopt their interests in an attempt to make new friends. Conversely, you may see a chat room as a place to express ideas and feelings that you think your parents or friends would disapprove of. Either way, you end up deceiving one group or the other. By pretending online to be someone you are not, you are deceiving your chat room contacts. On the other hand, if you do not express your real feelings and ideas to your family and friends, you are deceiving them.

Online discussions can be dangerous

A teenage boy chatting online with a woman

While chat rooms are a relatively recent phenomenon, the tendency for humans to lie and deceive is as old as history itself. The Bible reveals that the original liar, Satan the Devil, pioneered the tactic used by some chat room visitors. He disguised his real identity before telling his first lie. (Genesis 3:1-5; Revelation 12:9, 10) You can avoid being duped by liars by following King David’s example. “I have not sat with men of untruth,” he wrote, “and with those who hide what they are I do not come in.”-Psalm 26:4.

As noted earlier, some chat rooms may serve a useful purpose. Nevertheless, youths who want to please Jehovah must exercise extreme caution in their use of this modern communication method. If you need to access one, such as for a school project, ask your parents or perhaps another mature adult to sit in on your session. A future article will highlight two additional reasons why you should be cautious about logging on to chat rooms. It will also discuss how you can deal with specific problems that might arise even if you are cautious about their use.

* Some names have been changed.

# The book Questions Young People Ask-Answers That Work contains sound, Bible-based advice regarding sex before marriage, masturbation, and other similar topics.

% Some chat rooms classed as adult theoretically limit access to those over a certain age. This is usually because the topics discussed and the pictures shared are pornographic. However, surveys reveal that youths as young as nine lie about their age to gain access to adult chat rooms.

^ Since you cannot verify whom you are conversing with in a chat room, the person you are talking to may be pretending to be of the opposite sex, though actually being the same sex as you are.

An Ideal Age Must Be Valued For Online Chat Rooms

People are generally curious to know about many things such as, love, chat rooms, chat, and sex. There are many issues to talk about but many people usually find chat rooms an arena of showing and displaying their love and ended up with sex. Teenagers know many things about sex and love, but there should always be an ideal age to do something new or creative no matter if it is related to education, love or sex.

Parents should keep an eye on the behavior of their children no matter they uses internet for a short period of time. There is an ideal age to do something. There are many websites that has a content related to adults like sex, web cam sex, or love, which is not suitable for younger children or teenagers. Parents should allow their child to enter into the chat rooms that is totally based on education.

Internet is invented by human being only. Today children have learned to find the answer of their curiosity on internet. It gives children an easy access of their wanted or unwanted wants. Many websites are there, which allows free online chat for youngsters who are above 18 years and wanted to make new friends. There is a perfect time for everything. One should wait for that time patiently and enjoy the casual chat till then.

People may choose their type of environment for chat and they can also gift beautiful backgrounds to their close chat friends. Icons are also used most of the times to express people’s mood like smiley face, angry face, crying face and many other faces depending up on the mood.

Equal opportunities are given to every individual in case of giving opinions online as well as there is no such discrimination on grounds of gender and caste. For making a good impact on any individual, what all need is the skills of expression as well as fast typing speed. A good communicating skill will be certainly a plus point to make any conversation more fascinating and interesting.

In online chat rooms people should take care of their age and talk accordingly. They should value the time, money and age as well. Chat rooms are undoubtedly an interesting place where everyone can meet and discuss their problems, share their feelings and express love or whatsoever. One should always be of ideal age when they enter in any chat room.

There are many free online chat rooms websites are available for people who really want to have fun and entertainment after the long hours of hard work. You can look for various websites that are available for free and has the age bar. You can choose the best website that suits your needs and interest.

Ideal Age For Online Chat Rooms Must Be Respected

It is true that we have so many topics to chat about. But more often or not, we usually find that chat rooms have the topic of sex coming along the way. Because we are parents who really mind the well being of their children, we must never involve ourselves into allowing our children to log into sites that are specific on the age of members.

Why you need to be strict

The internet is an invention of man. Children of today have learned that you can trick the internet so that it gives you access to what you want. So, you would sometimes find that children would sign in on sites that require adults only as adults. They would exaggerate their ages so that they are adults.

However, this is something we cannot fully prevent but we can control it. When we monitor what our children are surfing in the internet and restrict them to what we do not want them to watch. We can also talk to them politely so that they understand the need to watch limits.

On the other hand, the owners or managers of cyber cafes can try to see that they restrict access to such sites for under 18 year olds. When these are done, there is little hope that at least, not all will access the sites that are for adults only. The children will therefore be allowed to chat only on the sites of their age mates.

No regrets later

Respecting the age of chatting at certain sites will minimize the hurt that comes with cheating. Sometimes, we would usually feel hurt when you realize that the person you have been chatting to is not real. Maybe they are younger or older than who you thought they are.

Even though people may also cheat on the descriptions they give about themselves as they register on the sites, it is quite important that everyone takes individual responsibility. This means that they will not cheat others and the others will not cheat them. For chatting to bring fun, there should be honesty.

It starts will individual persons. It is your responsibility to ensure that you never cheat other room mates. They must know the truth about you. In stead of lying about some details, it is better that you keep them to yourself. I mean, you will not be penalized for keeping them secret.

We all have a part to play in ensuring that the live chat we are longing for is in its best form. When we are all responsible, we will begin to appreciate the importance of turning to live chat when we are bored. As the name suggests, it will make us live again.

The sharing that we would enjoy at online chatting will ensure that all our psychological needs are catered for. So, we need to respect the age restrictions and sometimes location and gender barriers at the chatting sites.

Sexual Trauma and Sex Addiction in Women – The Link

Women who struggle with sexual addiction, relational or love addiction or sexual mismanagement have often times, been affected by various forms of sexual abuse or trauma.

During the years I spent leading a sexual addiction recovery group for women at the Willow Creek Community Church (mega-church), I realized that we all had similar pieces to our stories. I found that usually one or more of the following traumas or abuses had occurred during our childhoods.

1. Sexual Molestation

This could include any adult taking advantage of a child’s sexuality for the adult’s benefit or “high.” It could be inappropriate touch to the child or touching of the adult by the child, intentional exposure of the adult’s genitals to the child, penetration of the child, photographing the child without clothing or watching the child undress. This is not an all-inclusive list.

2. Exposure to Pornography

This could have been intentional or unintentional exposure to explicit cable TV movies, porn videos, porn magazines, or internet pornography. This could also be sexually explicit romance novels or cyber sex chat rooms.

3. Rape or Sexual Assault

Sexual Assault is a sexual act done to a person against their will. This can range anywhere from uninvited touch to non-concentual penetration of any sort. Sexual assault is a crime of violence and power.

4. Abortion

This is an operation or other procedure to end a pregnancy by removing an embryo or fetus from a women’s womb.

5. Abandonment by Father

This abandonment could range anywhere from a workaholic dad all the way to a father who physically left the home. The father piece appeared to be a big common factor amongst us. Many didn’t have fathers who emotionally connected with them.

Each one of the traumas that I listed above I have seen as common threads among women who are challenged with sexual addiction, love addiction, relationship addiction or just sexual mismanagement. You can see how any of the traumas above could affect a woman’s beliefs about her own self worth and her sexuality.

Sexual trauma has the ability to distort a person’s sexual attitudes and can lead to promiscuity, sexual anorexia, detachment during sex, sabotage of intimate relationships or even compulsive sexual behaviors such as solo sex, cyber sex and multiple affairs.

If you see yourself in any of the above scenarios, you could benefit from a program that is set up to give you the necessary information about how you wound up on this path, accountability and support for your transformation.

The Reasons You Should Date Online Through Online Dating Sites

If getting a date is easy for many people, there is no reason why it should be difficult for others. The reason getting a date is difficult for some is just because they don’t know how to go about it. People also date for different reasons and the reasons are best known to the parties involved. Dating is almost inevitable and this shows that dating is part of life because we all enjoy sharing time with our soul mates. If we all enjoy sharing time with our soul mates, it means the importance of sharing of time with someone we love is understood and the online dating sites have been playing a very vital role in this process. Many have not yet put online dating into consideration because they either believe they have no reasons to register with an online dating site or they don’t believe in the effectiveness of these sites. In this article, you will discover the reasons why you should register with an online dating site and date online.

1. Online Dating Sites Offer Wide Variety of Potential Partners.

People have different tastes and because there is wide variety of potential partners to choose from, getting your choice and a perfect match for yourself becomes easier. When you are signing up, you need to give your profile which is the platform on which searches are based. You are advised not to give wrong information about yourself in your profile. Members have competitive profiles and this gives you a better opportunity to pick the best partner for yourself. No one is imposing anyone on you, so you are not in a kind of haste that could make you choose a partner that is contrary to your choice. Online dating sites also have different people from different parts of the world and you can conveniently be successful with your search.

2. Online Dating Sites Are Time and Money Saving.

The time and effort you would have exhausted going a certain distance to look for a partner is saved. The effort that is required to make her see the reasons why she should accept your proposal and date you is also saved if you use online dating sites. Moreover, the money you would have spent to make your partner enjoy the relationship probably by taking her to places like a cinema, party, beach or out for lunch or dinner is saved. You might need to spend to make your partner happy and comfortable, buy wines, snacks, clothes and even jewelries but because you are dating online, you won’t need to do all of these to enjoy your date. It also saves you the signing up fee which means you are getting exposed to wide variety of potential dates for free.

3. You Have The Opportunity to Meet Other Like-Minded Singles.

Online dating sites offer you the opportunity to meet other like-minded singles. When you meet other singles of the same interest, it becomes easy to share ideas and the chance to advise one another on related issues becomes available. It is always very interesting to share thoughts with other singles of the same interest because you have the same thing in common. You can share your strengths and advise one another on your weaknesses. The understanding is always stronger because all of you are exposed to almost the same challenges. Everything you do, any challenge you face and whatever you experience is always better understood by other singles of the same interest.

4. You Can Communicate Effectively With Other Members.

Communication is the life wire of dating and the online dating sites are aware of this. Because the online dating sites know the importance of communication, they have made communication effective so that members can communicate easily and as quick as possible. With the use of their short message service systems, members are able to communicate with one another whenever they want. What makes communication more interesting in online dating is that you can chat with your partner and see each other through a webcam. With the help of effective communication, you can know your partner more from a far distance. When you even place his statements side by side with the way he looks, you can easily arrive at a remarkable conclusion.

5. Online Dating Sites Are Free to Join.

Online dating sites have made it easy for people to become members because you don’t have to pay to sign up. The registration fee can hinder many people from becoming members if they can’t afford it so it is free to everyone. Those of these online dating sites that require you pay to register have even made it affordable so that you don’t pay through your nose. When you are registering, it is not compulsory you give all your details but you are advised to be truthful with the information you are ready to give about yourself.

6. Online Dating Sites Give Rooms for Easy Termination of Relationships.

It is easier to terminate a relationship you established through the online dating sites because you are not seeing your partner physically. Someone that dates his/her partner physically gets tied in the relationship longer than desired. This is because he/she is highly compassionate and won’t be able to meet his/her partner eyeball to eyeball and say he/she is no longer interested in the relationship. This is because he/she won’t be able to bear the physical emotional reactions of his/her partner.

Dating online truly saves you money but does not in any way rule out the importance and influence of giving. Giving goes a long way to get the attention of your partner. It is easier in a case where you don’t have to spend a dime to get any gift of your choice for your partner. How do I mean? There are lots of incredibly awesome free products being given out by companies which you can always get at the blog below. If you were not aware, this is your chance to get your own completely free. You could also get a love test at my blog to check if you and your partner are for each other. Visit and get as many free products as you want right away.

6 Online Dating Tips for Guys That Actually Work

1. Choose the Right Site, Even if You Have to Pay For It

Never choose a dating site because that’s the one everyone else uses. The most popular sites have the most competition, not a good idea if you want to meet someone quickly. There are dozens of dating sites online. There are religious based sites, fetish based sites, sites based on sexual preference, online dating for seniors, there are race-based sites and many more.

Even if you have to pay a monthly fee, consider that fee an investment into your future. If you are lonely now, wouldn’t you pay $20 or less a month if you were told you could meet the woman of your dreams? Of course you would. You probably spend that on leisurely activities right now that don’t bring you near as much pleasure as a dream matchup would bring you.

There are free sites, low paid sites and expensive ones. Don’t just discount a site because it charges and never discount a free site because you think it’s too cheap and saturated. Choose a site based on your preference, your budget and the number of available matches there are in the dating pool. And don’t be afraid to try several at once. The more sites you put profiles on, the more likely you are to find a match.

2. Search Like You’re a Woman To Beat Your Competition

The hardest part about online dating for men is the filling out of the profile. Most men have absolutely no idea how to present themselves in order to maximize their dating chances. To make matters worse, most online dating help for men fails to touch the process of filling out the profile. Most articles and videos online tell men to be honest and let the woman know what you want. If you want to create a profile that gets results, you must study the competition. Who are you up against? This is going to require you to search the online dating site you’re on as if you were a woman.

It is going to feel strange looking through a bunch of guys’ online dating photos, but this is a necessary step if you want the greatest edge.

If you can take what’s working and make it better, you will succeed at online dating faster than any of the other guys in your dating pool. This is one of those free online dating tips that you rarely read online and yet it’s so effective at putting you on top of whatever dating site you choose.

Pay attention to the photos men are using, the language they’re using, their headlines and anything else that stands out. Take plenty of notes and then write your profile. When you have a page full of profile tidbits, headline ideas and other crucial elements, you won’t find yourself staring at a blinking cursor when you’re asked to fill out your About Me, Ideal Date and any other sections you are required to fill out.

In other words, cheat. Online dating for men doesn’t have to be so difficult if you know the easy ways to do things.

3. Be Honest With Your Date and Yourself

One of the biggest complaints most women have about online dating is the fact that men tend to lie. One recent dater recounted a story where she met a man in real life and she said that his age, height and weight were all different than he implied them to be via their online communications.

She said that he was two inches shorter, twenty years older and at least twenty pounds heavier. His response to being caught in a blatant lie, or three of them for that matter? He shrugged, smiled and said, “Everyone lies on the Internet.”

That is not the way to begin any type of relationship. Out of all the online dating tips for guys you will hear in your lifetime, heed this one first and foremost. Be honest about who you are and what your motivations are. Don’t lie about your age, weight, height, job, income or anything else. You will be found out eventually, especially if the date ever progresses to an offline setting.

Creating an online dating profile can cause you to really take a look at yourself. Don’t lie to make yourself feel better or to entice more dates to contact you. It’s not worth it and it will only deter possible matches in the future.

4. Dig Deep to Find Ice-Breakers

This is another bit of online dating advice guys never hear. When a woman fills out an online dating profile, that is all the information she wants you to know about her. The problem for her is, the Internet is vast and probably holds much more information than what she’s offering. In fact, there is probably information online that she’d rather you not know. Use this free online dating tip with caution. You can find out a lot more about your date by Internet-stalking her, so to speak, but you might not be able to erase any bad press you find from your mind. That can be a problem if you end up really liking the person.

If you don’t mind digging up a little dirt on your potential date-to-be, start Googling the person’s name, headline or anything else. People tend to use the same usernames across multiple platforms, headlines and other elements. Some people even put their Facebook profile links on their page. Use any and all information you find to your advantage.

Your goal isn’t to open a file on them or stalk them (looking someone up online is only called cyber stalking), rather it is to gather info that can be used to break the ice with that person.

You are looking for common ground, something that you both can talk and have a conversation about. This should really only be used if you can’t find anything in the person’s profile. These days you might uncover DUI arrest records, mugshots, divorce records and a lot more on Google and the other engines. Be careful what you search for.

5. Be Intriguing, Even if Your Life is Boring

Even if you live in a nondescript house and you work as an accountant, you can still make your life sound exciting. Get creative with it and pretend you’re writing a mystery novel. You don’t have to get too crazy with it, but try to be mysterious, intriguing and try to keep her guessing as to what you do or what you’re into. The more fun you have with it, the more you’ll stand out from other guys on the dating site you’re on and the more success you’ll have overall.

The dating advice guys need the most is the ability to leave the woman guessing. Leave some information for the first date. Nobody says you have to spill the beans in your profile. Leave her guessing, imply more than tell and you’ll get better results.

6. Get on the Phone or Cam Quickly

In the cult film Napoleon Dynamite, the main character’s brother, Kip, meets a girl online and is telling his brother about it across a table at a restaurant. Kip says that they’ve been chatting for two hours every night and, with a nod, says, “I guess it’s getting pretty serious.”

To make a true match with someone, you have to form an emotional connection. It is possible to form an emotional connection via chat. Kip is one example. However, you will build an emotional connection faster and with more impact if you can get the woman on the phone or Skype or other cam-based chat.

Once you form an emotional connect, the rest is fun and games. The endorphins will take over and you’ll be on that love rollercoaster that most people spend most of their lives reminiscing about and chasing. Get the digits or the Skype address and take your chat to the phone or cam for a much faster connection.